Rolling Along

I think I've definitely reached "jaded" status.  I'm just rolling through the motions of this IUI without a lot of excitement, hope, or much of any emotion, really.  I guess I had a minor stress episode when my bbt was up a bit when just starting to do my OPKs (and seeing a very faint line).  I thought I knew where I was in the cycle - quite early still - but then I got worried... which was my own fault really, since I tried to second-guess the fertility clinic's advice and skip a monitoring appointment.  I called the nurse sheepishly and agreed to come in the next morning, as planned.  I think I would likely have been okay waiting one more day but better safe than sorry. 

The follicles - all two of them :( - ended up being big enough to trigger, so I did so on the spot and came in for the IUI bright and early Sunday morning.  I felt quite a few twinges before and after ovulation this cycle... but no other symptoms so far, even though I'm on progesterone.  I was so disappointed to learn there were only two follicles - one on each ovary.  There were a few other little ones but they never took off. 

Oh, and I started acupuncture again last week with someone who seems a lot more skilled than the last "normal" acupuncturist I went to, and certainly more skilled than the community acupuncturists who can't even place needles in my abdomen.  At one point in the treatment, she used these cool needles that send electric pulses into the site.  She also put a few little needle patches in my ear before I left - anyone else had those?  I got used to them, but at first I kept forgetting they were there, rubbing my ear, and saying "Ow!".  I have another session tomorrow morning.

In other news, the universe has an odd sense of humor.  Turns out, S and I are heading up to visit my family in Oregon under pretty much the same circumstances of the ill-fated Tahoe trip!  It will be about the same time in my cycle, I'm on progesterone, and we're doing an injectable cycle.  Wish us luck! 

Luckily, I saw the counselor on Tuesday, and she gave me some good framing and strategies for us to use.  One strategy is to consciously have "recovery" time when we come out of a period of time with family.  Unfortunately, because they aren't able to do the unconditional love or acceptance thing, I am not able to be open and relaxed when I'm with them (mainly my parents) and can end up feeling not so good about myself.  This can lead to tension with S and I, which sucks.  So I want to try some journaling, prayer, meditation, quiet time, etc. when coming out of these times and see how it goes.

Saturday we are all meeting up at 11am and heading to the Duck game.  Woo hoo!  Then, we'll come back to my brother's house afterwards for dinner and to hang out.  S and I are bringing Zoey and staying in a hotel the first night (we'll likely get in very late on Friday), then at my brother's the next two nights.  He and his wife bought a big new house that has an extra room and bathroom, so that should be cool.  Can't wait to hold and play with my nieces and nephew.


  1. Hope you have fun in Oregon and the meditation/journaling/prayer/quiet time eases some of the tension for you two!

  2. I agree with Ali. I hope the trip is fun and as tension-free as possible. Take care of yourself!

  3. Hoping it all falls into place for you!

  4. Those two follicles could surprise you! Have a fun trip, it sounds like you are way more in tune to your feelings and reactions this time. That alone should make it more fun hopefully!!

  5. Have a great trip - and good luck with the IUI!

  6. Good luck in Oregon AND on this cycle. I'm sorry you're feeling jaded. Maybe it's your mind's way of protecting you from the rollercoaster of emotions...