I would welcome any prayers or good thoughts at this really difficult time with S and I. We had a blow up based on a situation that happened at my conference this week. I chose to take a group hot tub with some colleagues (two men and three women, including me) and S felt I was insensitive in how I communicated around it. He is packaging it with other recent experience and coming to the conclusion that I don't care for him enough, or in the ways that he needs. From my perspective, he sees things through a lens of fear and goes right to anger instead of trying to share his feelings more openly with me. I admit I have a low tolerance right now for this pattern, after having experienced it for a long time now. I'm ready for more stability and consistent closeness. Does that even exist? We're taking a week to reflect and regroup. I want to use this time to go inward and get more clear about my own feelings and level of commitment. It is a very hard time for us.