2/25/2012

It's Over... Again

Well, the Snake struck again.

I thought we were in an exploratory time together.  But he did his classic blindside routine, making a unilateral decision based on his own fears and insecurities. Instead of talking to me about these fears and insecurities. he informed me that he wasn't feeling the romantic side of things enough to continue moving forward.

I'm enraged and disgusted.  I trusted him and opened up to possibilities, though I had my own doubts.  I thought we were in it together.  There were so many ideas we discussed that will now never see the light of day.  I don't feel we gave it a good chance.

But believe me when I say I will not be lingering and suffering and analyzing over many months again.  He's not worth the time and energy.  I will be continuing on in my own growth growth and self-awareness process.  And hopefully I will meet someone who has the courage and the ability to meet me fully and honestly in an intimate relationship.  Until then, I will continue my own soul's work.

My doubts around chemistry definitely came up again this week, so from that perspective, I feel hope that I will find someone with whom I feel more spark.  And maybe, at some point soon, I will be in a position to pursue the family I've imagined for myself.

Today is a dark day, but I know tomorrow will be better.

10 comments:

  1. I"m sorry to hear that! I was really thinking that you two were on the right track. Apparently he can't see how amazing you are and how much he is going to be missing. hug

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    1. :Thanks, Peg. And for the hug - I need one!

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  2. I am so sorry, Kristina. I also thought that you two were having some great disussions and taking some positive steps, however if he is back to making unilateral decisions and not taking your feelings into consideration then its obviously a pattern, and you are right in stepping away. Sending you some good vibes.

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    1. I appreciate the affirmation, Sunflower, and the vibes.

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  3. I am really sorry, Kristina. Though, this is exactly what I went through with Tavo. You don't want to be with someone who has the ability to make such rash decisions and hurt you so much. I'm mad at S, and I don't even know him!! He's an ass, just like Tavo. GRR.

    If you ever want to talk, let me know. Wish I was there to hug you. xo

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    1. Yes, they are both asses. :( It's so painful. I kept using the word "disgusting" as well. There just isn't the right word for it. When someone says they love you and you've talked of the future, this behavior is so blindsiding. I'm sorry for your pain too. Thanks for the support.

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  4. I'm so sorry, Kristina. :( I had hope that the two of you could talk things through. I wish I could understand his behaviour, but you're right that it's waste of time thinking about it any longer. You deserve so much better.

    *hugs*

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  5. I'm so sorry, I thought you were going to work through it. You're right though, you're a great lady and you deserve so much better.

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