2/22/2012

Time Off and More Talking

This week has been one of three weeks off from my teaching job.  It just worked out that way because of a school break and a delay in signing on the next school.  Here's praying that the next school signs on the dotted line!  This situation classically illustrates the unreliable aspects of working for a grant program.  Luckily, I've been working double hours lately, which leaves me with a bit of savings.

I told myself (and S) that I was going to search for another part-time job for several hours every day this week.  I did spend time writing and reflecting on my goal of working as a Transition/Green Career Counselor.  And it looks like I can make some money working for the Perm.acultureXchange website, researching and conducting partner outreach..... but I haven't been disciplined enough and am feeling frustrated with myself.  Tomorrow is a new day and I WILL spend a good chunk of time to that end.

S and I spent all Sunday together.  The idea was that we would do our Sunday "routine," but, yeah, that didn't happen so much.  I came over and was flooded with emotion remembering the conflicts we had over there before we broke up and also that his ex had been living there all of December.

So, instead of Spiritual practice, we ended up talking a lot more about all that.  Then we did head down to the Farmer's Market and to dance/workout.  Followed by lunch and more talking.

Major insight:  when we've felt stuck trying to talk through conflict, he is totally committed to making me understand why my actions/strategy are not working, and I am totally committed to trying to reconnect through compassion for one another.  Mental versus emotional.  Head versus Heart.  Does not compute.  This is a breakthrough because we got stuck there a lot at the end!

Tonight we're going to dinner/movie.  And probably more talking!  Ha!

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