Candidate #3

So I just got done Skyping with "Candidate #3" on my initial list a couple posts ago.  The one who is 60 and lives in Vermont.

OMG, I love this guy for a co-parent.  He kicks "Candidate #1"s ass, at least with regard to what I would want.

We have so much similarity and resonance, it's coming out our ears. And I completely respect what he does for a living - he f'ing does contracted peace training and mediation internationally in Africa, Vietnam, etc.  He was recently ordained as an Interfaith Minister.  He "homesteads," which I'm imagining means they grow their own food and raise some livestock (and they have a tenant).  He's open-minded, flexible, calm, highly intelligent.  I think I could even get past his age... but why does he live in f'ing Vermont!

More details later...


  1. Wow, aside from the fact that he lives in VT, he sounds perfect for you! Well, perfect as a coparent, that is. :)

  2. He sounds great! I'm looking forward to hearing more.

  3. He does sound great and in sync with you, which is important since you both will be communicating and staying in touch over the care of the child. Hope to hear more.

  4. I have a question about the co-parenting. Do they share financially also? I am also glad you found a great prospect. With the DHEA I didn't get the breast thing. I have had other side effects acne and hair loss. I started taking it months ago. I was going to continue even thought I have a ways to go before I start trying.

  5. Hi honesty - yes, usually a co-parent would share in financial support of child. Each situation can be arranged how you prefer - equally or less equally in all areas: custody/time; finances, decision making, etc. I have come to decide I would want more time with them when they are a baby, then move into being more equal, assuming parents live near to one another. And unlike many women, assuming there is trust and shared values, I consider it a positive to be able to discuss and make important decisions with someone else versus always making them independently. But I've never been great at the solo decision-making process - I always consult my brother and sometimes others. Oh, and often with the finances, people pay for their own household (including feeding/housing child while with them) but education/daycare/clothes etc. are paid for based on percentage of earning - so if one parent earns 30% more than other then they would pay 30% more, etc. This is usually all outlined in a co-parent contract.